This flower is astonishingly functional!

This flower is astonishingly functional!

NANCY CARR • In this season of thankfulness, I am grateful to the Hey Dullblog spam filter. Whenever I clean it out I appreciate anew its kidneyesque work of protecting us all from poorly-worded importunities to buy pharmaceuticals, fake luxury items, or memberships to sketchy dating sites. The most garbled messages, however, attain a level of lunacy that I can imagine John Lennon giggling over and then weaving into a nonsense song, a la “Dig a Pony.” [After he’d bought some pharmaceuticals and fake luxury items, Michael G. adds.]

Curiously, virtually all the robo-generated spam comments contain fawning expressions of gratitude for the site and its writers. I figure that whenever we’re discouraged, we can just reread these affirmations and recall that we are Basically Magnificent. And hey, if you’re reading this site, I’m sure you are too! So enjoy these unedited selections from the filter.

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